As alluded to in my profiley bit, I sometimes have bizarre, ridiculous and funny things happen to me….I like to call them Lyncidents! , commonly known by others as ‘it could only happen to me’, or ‘Doh!’

Sometimes they are small things, like jumping out of my skin when the toast pops out of the toaster, even though I’m standing there waiting for it to do so. Or sitting waiting for a pan of pasta to cook for my dinner, only to find I’d turned the wrong ring on when I go out to drain it, so it’s still raw and sitting in cold water. Popping to the loo while I wait for the kettle to boil, coming back and making a cuppa, only to find that I hadn’t actually turned the kettle on, so had made the tea with cold water.

Occasionally it is fairly epic, and leads to high hilarity for those that witness it. One that immediately springs to mind involved my 3 eldest grandchildren. I had been at their home for a while, catching up, playing, chatting etc, as you do. When it came time for me to leave, I got my coat on and prepared for the lovely goodbye hugs and kisses I knew were coming my way. Having duly done this with the 2 grandsons, I then leaned over the back of the sofa to kiss their sister goodbye. Now this was a fairly low-backed sofa, about hip height, so it was a very low bend from the waist. I realised fairly quickly that I had got the angle and speed REALLY wrong, and it was going to be messy, so decided to try and turn myself over so I could land on my back on the said sofa. Got the angle and speed wrong on that too!

The result was a very inelegant, slow slide over the back of the sofa, partly over the seat and heading for the floor, coming to rest upside down, facing up (at least I got that bit right) with my head on the floor, and my body diagonally up the sofa with my legs in the air.

As you can imagine, hysterical laughter from the children AND their parents was the first reaction,(with an ‘Ooer, help! from me) and then my eldest grandson stepped in to help me right myself. The way he did this was to grab me by the head to try and lift me back onto the sofa. Now he was only 8 or 9 at the time and, although strong, couldn’t possibly have lifted a grown Granny up and onto the seat, when I was almost vertical. So he let go again…my head meeting the floor again with quite a bump.

In the end I had to continue the slow, inelegant slide off the sofa and onto the floor, where I stayed for a while until I could stop laughing too.

I’m good at losing things in a bizarre way too, and dealing with them with a weird sense of humour. I don’t get out much…it passes the time lol

Last year I lost a slipper. I definitely put 2 on when I got out of bed, but later in the morning I couldn’t find the left one anywhere, nor could I remember at what point I first noticed it missing. I tend to sit on my left leg in the armchair, and always kick my slipper off to do so, so that’s where it SHOULD have been I thought. But no!

Now I live in a 1 bed flat, so there are only 4 rooms and a hall that it could have been left in….could I find it? Could I heck! For 2 days I hunted high and low for this danged furry thing that had gone AWOL, totally mystified as to where I could have left it. I even put a ‘missing, please help’ post on FB….just for a giggle really, ‘cos it seemed so ridiculous that I couldn’t find it in my small place. I even tried to placate the lonely slipper that was left, by offering it my furry hotty bottle cover as a new mate, but it wasn’t impressed….putting pictures up on FB to show it….weird I know, but seemed humorous at the time, and made some peeps giggle 🙂

And then……..EUREKA! I spotted a small bit of fur peeping out from under a sofa cushion. I quickly did a head count of the cats, but they were all present and correct in the garden soooo…it had to be THE SLIPPER! And it was, jammed right down the back of the end sofa cushion. The mystery now was how it got there? Took me another couple of days to work that one out. It had been nice weather, so I had been airing the place with windows wide, and decided to wash the lounge curtains and nets too. In order to get the curtains down, I had to stand on the arm of the sofa, unscrew the ball thing at the end of the rail, and slip them off (eyelet curtains, you know the ones with circular holes along the top to slide direct onto the rail?). I’m not so hot at balancing on a sofa arm AND looking up at the same time, so probably lost my balance a few times, righting myself by stepping back onto the cushions….I’m guessing one of those steps back resulted in my foot going down the back of the cushion, leaving my slipper behind when extricated, and being so intent on what I was doing I didn’t notice.

So there you are, an idea of the little Lyncidents I have on an almost daily basis. My boys say it’s my age….I deny that emphatically, I just like to be different….either that or I’m just plain DAFT!

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